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My Soul, Wait Thou ONLY Upon God

By Ruth Heinemann

Argh!! Why is so and so treating me this way? Why can’t he (or she) get his (or her) act together? Sound familiar? As singles, many of us have unresolved anger issues over romantic disappointment or hurt that we have experienced in our pasts. We become angry over those romantic interests who don’t live up to our expectations, those who hurt us, those who don’t return our interest, and the list could go on.

After walking that path for some time and not knowing how to deal with it constructively, I discovered a very powerful principle. The main principle is that we become angry at others because we have expectations of them. Ultimately, we expect them to fill a need that only God can fill. What is the solution? The answer is found in Psalm 62:5: "My soul, wait thou only upon God, for my expectation is from Him."

I had memorized that verse when I was 19 years old, but never really grasped what it really meant to me in the deepest practical sense. After I watched a video by a well-known family specialist, the truth hit home.

As human beings, God never intended for us to get our primary satisfaction and fulfillment from anyone but Him. Unfortunately, sin entered into the picture. Adam and Eve chose to become self-dependent instead of God-dependent. The whole human race plunged into chaos. Instead of looking to God as their primary fulfillment source, they chose to look to each other. A verse from Genesis shows this predicament from some of the earliest stages:

"Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee." (Genesis 3:16)

Very early on, Eve learned how to seek her satisfaction in Adam. Unfortunately, this was definitely not a one-sided problem. Adam allowed his love for his wife to cloud his good judgment and common sense. As a result, he took the step that confirmed the human race’s plunge into degeneracy and despair.

There is a huge problem with seeking our satisfaction in other people. God created a longing in our hearts that can only be filled by Him. The multitude of addictions and vices in the world is proof positive that most people are trying to meet their deepest needs through people or substances. This never works. Our hearts can only be filled by a relationship with our Creator.

"For he is our God; and we are the people of his pasture, and the sheep of his hand." (Psalm 95:7) As God's little lambs, the only place that we will be truly happy is the pastures of God. God wants to bring us into the most intimate fellowship with Himself and completely eliminate all these hidden dependencies in our lives.

In another Bible passage, God showed me the same principle: "Verily, Verily, I say unto you, He that entereth not by the door into the sheepfold, but climbeth up some other way, the same is a thief and a robber." (John 10:1)

Later on in this chapter, Jesus identifies Himself as being the door. Now, let's look at verse 10: "The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly."

The sheer implications of that passage hit me like a load of bricks. Any person, substance, activity, habit, or anything else that tries to take God’s place in our lives is a thief and a robber! God wants to give us the most abundant life possible. However, Satan, the enemy of our souls, wants to steal away this experience in any way that he possibly can. When we are not finding our joy in Christ, life will be a tremendously heavy burden. We will be crushed, disillusioned, angry, and bitter. However , when we put our full delight in Christ, He will give us that abundant life that He promises to us in John 10:10.

Now, with these frames of reference in mind, let’s go back to Psalm 62:5: "My soul, wait thou only upon God, for my expectation is from Him."

When we are angry or hurt, we should pray to God something like this, "Lord, I know that I am expecting someone other than you to make me happy. Father, please keep my focus and dependence on You. Help me to truly experience Your peace and joy and to draw my life only from You."

We can then drop our wounded expectations at the feet of Jesus and keep on running the race, while depending only on Jesus to fill our needs and to bring us joy.

As I began to grasp these principles it was exciting. I knew that God had so much more for me than I had experienced in the past. He wanted me to know Him at a much deeper level. I trust that He will continue to reveal to me any unsurrendered areas of my life so that I may continue to grow in Him and trust that He will provide my needs at the right time.

No, He hasn’t given me a husband or even a boyfriend. But He has given me something far richer as He daily teaches me to seek my joy in Him. Truly, "My God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus."

© 2004 Ruth Heinemann

Ruth Heinemann is a Bible worker in the Florida Keys. She enjoys reading, friendships, and going to the beach.

    Romantic Disappointment by Fern Horst

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